(Source: sambram3000)


The potatoes have escaped

  • me: home alone yes time to fuck shit up and be rebellious
  • me: uses computer without headphones


if you ever feel bad about you asexuality I think you should embrace who you are :)


What do you call a  sad signal? 

Remorse code. 




Update: the girl I went on a date with bought me Mac&Cheese annnnnnnd… I said yes


Nobody can stop me

  • me: what do priests call it when a church goes nuclear
  • friend: This is going to make me angry isn't it?
  • me: critical mass!
  • friend:
  • friend:
  • friend: I fucking hate you
  • my statistics professor: Alright everyone! As a sort of icebreaker, turn to the person next to you and ask 'will you marry me?'
  • everyone: *does it*
  • professor: You might think that was unusual, but it's important because students need to be engaged.